Testo Skimbleshanks, the railway cat Musical

Skimbleshanks, the railway cat

Old Deuteronomy
Skimbleshanks

Old Deuteronomy & Jemima
the railway cat,

All
the cat of the railway train
There's a whisper down the line at eleven thirty-nine
When the night mail's ready to depart
Saying, "Skimble, where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble
We must find him or the train can't start!"

Skimbleshanks
All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
Would be searching high and low
Saying "Skimble, where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
Then the night mail just can't go"
At eleven forty-two with the signal overdue
And the passengers all frantic to a man
That's when I would appear and I'd saunter to the rear
I'd been busy in the luggage van!

All
Then he gave one flash of his glass-green eyes
And the signal went "All clear!"
They'd be off at last for the northern part of the northern hemisphere!
Skimbleshanks, the railway cat, the cat of the railway train

Skimbleshanks
You could say that by and large it was me who was in charge
Of the sleeping car express
From the driver and the guards to the bagmen playing cards
I'd supervise them all more or less

All
Down the corridor he paces and examines all the faces
Of the travellers in the first and the third
He establishes control by a regular patrol
And he'd know at once if anything occurred
He would watch you without winking and he saw what you were thinking
And it's certain that he didn't approve
Of hilarity and riot so that folk were very quiet
When Skimble was about and on the move
You could play no pranks with Skimbleshanks
He's a cat that cannot be ignored
So nothing went wrong on the northern mail
When Skimbleshanks was aboard

Skimbleshanks
It was very pleasant when they'd found their little den
With their name written up on the door
And the berth was very neat with a newly folded sheet on
And not a speck of dust on the floor
There was every sort of light you could make it dark or bright
And a button you could turn to make a breeze
And a funny little basin you're supposed to wash your face in
And a crank to shut the window should you sneeze

Rumpelteazer
Achoo!

Skimbleshanks
Then the guard looked in politely and would ask you very brightly
"Do you like your morning tea...

All
Weak or strong?"

Skimbleshanks
But I just behind him and was ready to remind him
For Skimble won't let anything go wrong

Queens
When they crept into their cozy berth and pulled the counterpane

Toms
They ought to reflect that it was very nice
To know that they wouldn't be bothered by mice
They can leave all that to the railway cat

All
The cat of the railway train
Skimbleshanks, the railway cat, the cat of the railway train

Skimbleshanks
In the watches of the night I was always fresh and bright
Every now and then I'd have a cup of tea
With perhaps a drop of scotch while I was busy keeping on the watch
Only stopping here and there to catch a flea
They were fast asleep at Crewe
And so they never knew that I was walking up and down the station
They were sleeping all the while I was busy at Carlisle
Where I met the stationmaster with elation
They might see me at Dumfries if I summoned the police
If there was anything they ought to know about

All
When they got to Gallowgate there they did not have to wait
For Skimbleshanks would help them to get out

And he gives you a wave of his long brown tail
Which says, "I'll see you again"
You'll meet without fail on the midnight mail
The cat of the railway train

The cat of the railway train

A third crash interrupts the celebration, and this time the villainous Macavity appears! Two of his henchman invade the proceedings and kidnap Old Deuteronomy! Two felines familiar with Macavity, Demeter (a frightened kitten who had been previously abducted by Macavity) and the older and more sensual Bombalurina (a goodtime girl who gets along with everyone) sing what they know of "Macavity